Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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