who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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