Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
