the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
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