Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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