My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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