He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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