if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Randomize