do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
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