at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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