Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
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