cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Randomize
