i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize