Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
either way he was missing a nipple.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
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