My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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