Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
