do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
