Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize
