you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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