i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
