Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
