I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Randomize
