Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
you never un-have a 4some
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
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