Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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