What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
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