I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize