People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
