We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
