Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
