So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I think I am morally bankrupt
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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