are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
You don't make any sense
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