yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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