Whod you bang
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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