He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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