can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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