Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
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