I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I just blew my weed a kiss
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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