That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
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