i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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