Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
