i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
