do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
