I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I just gargled with NyQuil
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
