Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize