just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
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