What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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