I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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