so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Randomize
