i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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