The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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