when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
